Thursday, August 4, 2016

Paschal, McLean and FIVE Days a Week

Hat compliment of TJ-- who didn’t try to sway me at all in this process but the impromptu hat purchase blew her cover. ; )
I finally got Julia registered at Paschal today {our public high school}.  It all felt very normal and very strange….. all at the same time.  If you’ve ever talked with me longer than 5 minutes about homeschool, you probably heard me say either, “We are taking things year by year.” or “We’d love for them to have a bigger experience {larger school} before they move off to college while they are still under our roof.”  High school seemed the natural transition time and so here we are.  Registered at Paschal.  A 6A school. It will definitely be a “bigger experience” and I am very excited for her.  I homeschooled her for five years and then she attended CLPS for 4 years where she was still home with me 3 days a week and then 2 days a week her 7th and 8th grade year.  I’d be presumptuous to say that she’s ready for the change.  I’d rather say, it’s time for the change to see if she IS ready.  Julia is the one in control of that— how she will respond to the change in her dailies. I bet she’s ready for SOME of it but not all, but that is where I can pray she will learn.  Just like so many of her friends, she’s got a great framework within her for good decision making— whether she will use it or not is up to her.  Right?  Oh, the plights of parents with teenagers!  Maybe I am being dramatic or maybe I’m speaking with no faith, but launching kids in this age is like none other in history.  Dramatic?  Maybe.  I will NOT turn this into another blog post but just think of all that is available at their fingertips— and if you decide NOT to go the smartphone route— all that is available at their friends’ fingertips with your kids standing by.  Okay, so that’s just ONE thing but IT’S A THING!

However, I’m hanging on to these VERY OLD words:

His divine power has given us EVERYTHING WE NEED for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.  2 Peter 1:3

God knew EXACTLY what 2016 would be like and I take huge comfort in that.  Will stop there.

These four have known each other since birth. I love that they are all still friends.  {Next year-- three different schools!}
Did I mention we learned a lot this year?  So many experiences ripe for the learning!! I wouldn’t change a thing.

It was a great year with really sweet friends.  She will miss so many of them {I will too!} but we plan to see some of them as much as we possibly can!

All these sweet girls-- I so wish we could take all of them with us!!

Then there’s Brighton.  He’s headed to McLean 7th/8th grade campus— a little earlier than the natural transition time to high school.  For him, it was just time.  I homeschooled him for 3 years and he also attended CLPS for 4 years being home with me 3 days a week.  This has been a little trickier.  This isn’t true of all boys but it was true of my boy.  Let me see if I can make sense of it as I type.  As Brighton was getting older, Jeff was challenging him in different ways to grow up, as any dad should.  And maybe some boys need more of a push out of boyhood because I think for some it’s an easier shift than for others.  Brighton is a sensitive and intuitive guy— he’s known for a while it was time to give up some of his little boy ways.  But the knowledge doesn’t make it easier.  And being at home with Julia and me didn’t make it any easier either.  I feel like he was in a constant state of push and pull with me.  Pushing me away because he knew he needed to be more independent and pulling back in because I was available and a very easy option for him.  This was not always pretty—- the pushing especially and the back and forth was utterly frustrating and exhausting.  And he was caught between where he knew he should be as a young man and the easy option of me right here in the comfort and privacy of our home.  Can you imagine my struggle too?  Needing to push him out a little more but then having trouble as a mom from time to time to KEEP pushing?  That plays on the maternal heartstrings.  As they say, the struggle was real and something needed to be done.  School five days a week seemed to make very good sense.  It’s the perfect push.  A normal one.  Is he ready for the change?  We will see, won’t we?

If you don’t have a 12 year old, let me explain something.  He is PERFECTLY HAPPY in this picture.  I know.  There is NO indication in the photo but he is.  I think it’s something like “cool factor” or identity confusion.  Not really sure, but I do know he is happy. 

I’ve gotten this question a lot this summer, “FIVE DAYS!!  What are you going to do with FIVE DAYS with no kids?”  People, this is monumental.  Seriously.  I have not given it much thought YET for a couple of reasons.  One, I LOVE summer.  I couldn’t wait for it to get here and now that we are SO close to the end, I am in denial and doing my best to live IN the day— preferably, by the pool with my friend, Elise, who loves it as much as I do. I have refused to talk backpacks and tennis shoes with Brighton.  I. Don’t. Want. To.  Two, and I am almost scared to type it…. Five days.. it sounds too good to be true and I don’t think I will believe it until I am in it.  I LOVED homeschooling my kids and if you doubt it click over here, but five days for adult things is almost out of my realm of thoughts.  I have never had that thought— just once when the kids were at camp at the same time one summer but I don’t recall another time.  FIVE days.  I have been careful not to commit to anything new because I know how it all fills up to overflowing just fine on its own.  I plan to take in new things slowly.  I must.  Like I said, it’s monumental.

With that to look forward to I still have a fear which all fears become part of daily prayers so I am sending this one up often.  I am an introvert— a social, functional introvert.  As my social interaction increases so does my need for solitude— just to regroup and reenergize— and then I am ready to go again.  My family will tell you, I have not always been in the greatest of moods say, around 5— end of day.  I like to blame it on all of the interactions of the day- the pushing and pulling.  I’ll leave it at that.  But I have blamed much of my mood late in the day on it.  So that means minus about 7-8 hours of that a day, I should be a regular beam of sunshine come 4 and 5 o’clock.  Is that possible?  If I set up my day correctly, could I be set and ready to be nice— to everyone— by 4ish?  What if I am not?  What if I am just a crabby person every day after 4 and I am just finding that out?  This is my fear.  I am trying to keep this light but in all seriousness, I am praying 4 o’clock feels different next year.  I have struggled with this for a long time— knowing that if I am walking in the Spirit I should be joyful, kind and patient.  I have missed something so many days.  And I have prayed for forgiveness so many days.  I am dependent on Him every moment of every day.  I have no doubt in my mind that I am a girl in need of a Savior.  And I believe that is right where He wants me.

We are coming for you, Next Year.  You may pose some real fears for all three of us but we feel led to here by a good God who's definitely faithful and ever present. As homeschool provided all sorts of opportunity for growth, I know traditional school will too, so I say,

 “Welcome”.  In the humblest way.

I am counting on a great year.


Emily said...

This post made me realize how much B's face has changed this year! What is happening!???! :) So very excited to see what our good Father will do for you three this coming fall.

Sarah said...

FIVE DAYS!!! I can't wait to see what God will bring to fill those days... and if you ever get bored, you can come on over here! ;)