A Christmas State of Mind (Part II)

And when [the Magi] saw the star, they were overjoyed. Matthew 2:10

During the Christmas season, our

overwhelmed state of mind can overrule any opportunity for us to be overjoyed.

When it comes to the problem of our overwhelmed state of mind, the Magi, even in all their pomp and splendor, represent a simplicity that is so attractive to me. Everything about what they did in Matthew chapter two was intentionally simple. Their focus was on one thing--- to find the Savior of the world and to worship Him. Therefore, questions I have to ask myself are: Is my focus intentionally simple or is it multi-dimensional causing everything to seem pointless and chaotic? Is my calendar a big overlapping mess? Is my to do list out of control? Am I feeling suffocated by all the options?

I will touch on three things that have helped me not to feel so overwhelmed. My biggest distraction is the calendar. I think of myself as the “keeper” or “protector” of the calendar at our house. My son Brighton is ALL about the calendar and our schedule. He has been since he was three. SEVERAL times a day, he asks me where we are going and what are we going to do? He has been known to do this many days in advance which, sometimes, just wears me out. Two things go on here: One, most of time I don’t even know and when I admit that, it frustrates him or disappoints him. Two, sometimes I don’t want to be reminded of what is 72 hours away. I like things one at a time. (Finally, at 38, I can admit that I am not a great multi-tasker.) However, because of him, I am almost always aware of what’s “next” on the calendar and it can become overwhelming.

Does it not amaze you how all those calendar squares can fill up so fast? A new month looks really good until about the last few days of the month before. Practically speaking, I think this is where the delete button comes in real handy. I see it sometimes as almost a fight—a fight for time with my family. If I don’t guard it, someone or something else will be happy to take it over.

When it comes to the calendar during the Christmas season, our family tries to keep at least two weeknights and two blocks of time on the weekend blacked out for our family in order to experience the holidays together. This means that we don’t get to accept every single invitation or take advantage of all that is going on in our great city. I am not saying we bar the doors and lock ourselves in (even though, at times, that sounds blissful) but, as keepers of the calendars, we have to be intentional to make room to be overjoyed instead of overwhelmed. Intentionality means sitting down, making decisions and mapping out December with your family.

There are all sorts of ideas out there about what to do when you make the time to be at home. Some of my favorites are reading Christmas books (that have been out of sight since last Christmas), cooking together, letting the kids tell the Christmas story with the nativity pieces (again and again and again), watching a Christmas classic, listening to quiet Christmas music snuggled up under the light of the tree, crafting a gingerbread house, answering Christmas questions like: What is your favorite Christmas memory or Christmas present and why? What is the first Christmas you really remember? How do you think (pick a character from the Christmas story) felt and why? It doesn't have to be a dog and pony show. The main thing is being intentional about being together. The possibilities are endless. Proverbs 12:20 says there is “joy for those who promote peace”. Starting with the calendar, let’s be intentional about promoting some peace which clears the way for experiencing joy in our homes.

The second thing I try to do to ward off that overwhelmed feeling is planning. Rocket science, I know, but sometimes it feels like it to actually carry it out. To avoid surprises later, I recommend you make your to do list and take a look at it even before Thanksgiving. (Surprises seem massive in December.) I know it’s a discipline but I have done it both ways and planning is now a no-brainer for me. Just pick a day in November (like today) and list all that has to be done and by what date. You will be amazed by how much you can whittle away now that you have identified it.

The last thing I’ll share that has helped me to simplify my focus during the Christmas season is my decorations. Before we had kids, someone challenged me to be intentional even in this area. I was encouraged to weed out anything in my Christmas boxes that might confuse visitors or our kids about what or who we were celebrating. I have to say this was hard because I had many wonderful things that met that “confusing” criteria. But over the years, I have realized that being intentionally focused on the “who” we are celebrating has simplified my decorating and my purchases. Don’t get me wrong. I love to decorate for Christmas. I am actually energized by it and I consider it part of my celebration- that is, unless I have a problem with a string of lights and that is when I call on Jeff to "celebrate" with me! However, there is a focus on Christ that, for me, makes it all much simpler.

The next post will be about our choice in all of this. Thanks for reading!