Tuesday, April 22, 2008

A Flat Rug

Flat, not with an enormous elephant under it. I found the rug to be completely flat, with no remnants of large trunked creatures under it- barely even dust. I got to meet my Mom and a dear friend, Denise, in Ohio this weekend where Denise’s handsome son, Drew, was playing “Jimmy” in the clever musical “Thoroughly Modern Millie”. I was blown away by Drew’s smooth, strong voice and how he brought his character to life so vividly that at times I forgot he was Drew, the adorable brown eyed little boy I had babysat from time to time in my hometown. His facial expressions communicated volumes and his timing was impeccable. You never wanted his song to end and apparently, his voice had an interesting impact on the female cast. I got wrapped up in his hopeful romance with Millie waiting for his good looks and sweet charm to melt away her “modernism” ……………until he, well, grabbed her and laid a big smoochie on her. Then, in an instant, he was Drew again and I was like, “Whoa!!!!!!!!! Okay, that’s LONG enough. You barely even know her! Is she a nice girl?? DO something, Denise!” I stole a glance at his mom, who never took her eyes off of her boy the entire show and she was just smiling, so I just forced one too and decided to ask my 10 questions later. (Even though, I still wondered if she was, indeed, a nice girl.) All ended well for Millie and Jimmy (no more kissing) and we had seen a delightful performance.

Okay, the rug and the three of us. Because of my immaturity in Christ during my high school years, I created tension between these two amazing women. First let me say, Mom and Denise have always loved each other. They have been friends way longer than I have been friends with Denise. Unfortunately, for a season, their friendship was strained because of me.

I would steal away to Denise’s home any chance I could because there, I felt understood and nurtured in my relationship with Christ. I don’t even know that I really tried to communicate at home all that was going on in my heart at the time. It seems like every time I tried, it all came out terribly judgmental and legalistic which was completely opposite to what I was being taught. My Mom had every right to battle this ugliness that seemed to come out so often in her teenage daughter and to her credit, she let me see all this for what it really was instead of pointing it out in every discussion we had. Sadly, I was out from under my parent’s roof before I understood how “Phariseeical” I had been. In high school, as I continued to follow Denise (and sometimes her husband, John) around their home, learning all I could, she could not in good conscience send me away and, in turn, my Mom never said I could not go over there. So we all walked this wobbly tight rope for years--- wanting to do the right thing, not wanting to offend anyone or hurt anyone’s feelings or overstep anyone’s boundaries.

I have now been out of my parent’s wonderful home for 20 years and up until last Thursday morning I had my reservations about how this trip of 3 would go- 3 ladies who share unique, once in a life time relationships: long time friends, mother-daughter, discipler-disciple. Well, I walked up to meet them at the airport in Dayton, Ohio and there they were, talking and laughing just as I would have been with a friend on a girl’s trip. They had evidently talked each other silly since the early morning drive to Atlanta and they really never stopped. To my delight, it seemed they had more to talk about than I did with them. It did my heart a world of good to see two of the women I love most in the world going on about this and that and truly enjoying one another. Each one is still my mentor, in their own special and beautiful way. One, my mother and sister in Christ and the other, the dearest of friends and also, my sister in Christ. This weekend, we enjoyed fellowship of the sweetest kind. No more tight rope walking, no more mountainous rugs, just a flat rug on a nice, clean, sturdy floor.


"Bluebonnet in the snow" said...

Wow! What a great metaphor!

TJ Wilson said...

Wiping a little tear from my eye.. I have such an appreiciation for both women because of their influence and love poured into YOU. One thing I think about with my own children is who will mentor them... I suppose I need to pray for taming (flattening) elephants along the way. Love this post, K. Beautiful.

nikki said...

i'm so glad you had such a great time!!

Kathie said...

I can't believe you were in Dayton Ohio, my home town! Gosh, now when I talk about it, you can picture it. I love the fact that the three of you had such a perfect time together with NO elephants to walk around! Love you, Kath

Anonymous said...

I just thought you hated Mom for 2 years! luv ya bsd